{Look at these reviews
A satiric masterpiece
No way out
A surprise smash!
No way out
It was shocking, outrageous, insulting
And I loved every minute of it!
No way out}

How could this happen?
The show was lousy and long, we did everything wrong
Where did we go right?
Christmas came early to Broadway this year
And guess who they stuffed in our stocking? Adolf Hitler!
It was so crass and so crude even Goebbels would've booed
Where did we go right?

Last night a star was born on Broadway the lovely Miss Ulla
Inga Hansen Bensen Yonsen Tallen-Hallen Svaden-Svanson
We predict that her name will soon be up in lights
If they can find enough bulbs

We searched Broadway on and off
For singers with a cough
We had tryouts and auditions by the score
And to trip the light fantastic
We picked dancers who were spastic
If anyone jetted, we jetted them out the door

They shouted hooray for that sausage on display
Where did we go right?
Our leading man was so gay he nearly flew away
Where did we go right?
A show so easy to despise
Now it's up for the Pulitzer prize
Oh, where, oh, where, tell us
Where did we go right?

The best new music of the decade!
Max Bialystock is a theatrical genius!
Now they like me

Oh, we knew we couldn't lose
Half the audience were Jews
It's the end of our careers
It'll run for twenty years
Tell us where did we go right?