Yeah man, what ***k you want me to do?
You want me to phone your girlfriend, yeah
And apologize on your behalf?
Does it look like I got '****' on my forehead?

No one's saying you're a ****
But at the end of the day I'm asking you a favor
Nah, man
So what? Wouldn't I do the same thing for you
Bruv, I would not ask you to phone my girlfriend

Ah you ***kin' prick
Sometimes you act like you're dumb or thick
Can't you take the hint that I can't let you in
You're such a pain in the arse you are
I should spark your jaw
I hear your [unverified] kicking at my door

On my free phone there's 3 missed calls
Shouting through my letter box all pissed off
I don't give a ****, so prick, piss off
Plus I got a yatty in the gaff with a batty
That is ready for some lashing from the back

She's been here since pop world started
And I ain't even got to pop her bra yet
All you really care about is football
Every ***king hour it's Liverpool, Liverpool
We'll you've picked the wrong day, prick
I don't care if you're pissed off, you make me sick

***k Tony
***k Tony
***k Tony
***k Tony

You unreliable ****
This is about the third time I have rung
You know I'm supposed to beat your drum
Kick off's at 2 and it's half past 1

Look at you in and done, it's the cup final
And you know I'm a Liverpool fan, Steve's my idol
And we both came up with the plan to tell the guys to
That we were all going to jam in your living room
In front of the digital

Even when I got the Guinness and the chicken patties
Who the ***k do you think are getting me flippin' abby
You're taking the liberty, you're a prick
I go round your house to give your door a couple of kicks

I bet your in the room right now
With the blinds down but I'll soon find out
You're takin' the piss last week was my shout
Paid for the box office for that big ***le bout

***k Teddy
***k Teddy
***k Teddy
***k Teddy

For your own sake and future reference mate
Do yourself a favor, call 08 702 40 40 40
Then you won't have to be calling me
Calling me, calling me, you tight ****

Get your paper out your pocket
And pay for the satellite dish or cable socket
And don't come around here chatting **** again
When I'm about to get a yatty with a batty in my bed

Next time when you'll need a favor, bruv
Think before you call 'cause I'll hang up
All 'cause of you the guy that keeps texting me endlessly
Now my box is full with so many damn messages

You arse, go get your facts straight
You said it was cool to come and watch the game
So don't make promises you can't keep
Oh yeah and I'm keeping your DVD, you ****

You know don't worry, I won't ask you a favor again
I don't give a ***k what you do mate
'Cause know what I mean 'cause you can't try
And get me to phone your girl

And know what I mean
It's no ***kin' meals and ****s business around here, mate
What you talking about?
I don't give a ***k, ***k what you talkin' about