We're sitting here today with film star Natalie Portman
Hello, so Natalie, what's the day
In life of Natalie Portman like?
Do you really wanna know? Please, tell us

I don't sleep mother***ker off that yak and Durban
Doin' one twenty, gettin' head while I'm swervin'
Damn Natalie, you a crazy chick

Yo, shut the ***k up and suck my ****
I bust in dudes mouth like gushers mother***ker
Roll up on NBC and smack the **** outta Jeff Zucker

What you want, Natalie? To drink and fight
What you need, Natalie? To ***k all night

Don't test when I'm crazy on that airplane glue
Put my foot down your throat till you **** in my shoe
Leave you screaming, pay for my dry cleaning
***k your man, it's my name that he's screamin'

I'm sorry Natalie, but are we to believe you
Condone driving while intoxicated?
I never said I was a role model
What about the kids that look up to you?
Do you have a message for them?

All the kids lookin' up to me can suck my ****
It's Portman mother***ker, drink till I'm sick
Slit your throat and poor nitrous down the hole
Watch you laugh and cry while I laugh you die

And all the dudes you know I'm talkin' to you
We love you Natalie, I wanna ***k you too
P is for Portman, P is for *****
I'll kill your ***kin' dog for fun, so don't push me

Well, Natalie I'm surprised
All this from a Harvard graduate
Well, there's a lot you may not know about me
Really? Such as?

When I was in Harvard I smoked weed every day
I cheated every test and snorted all the yay
I gotta a def posse and you gotta bunch of dudes
I sit right down on your face and take a ****

Natalie, you are a bad *** *****, hell yeah
And I always pay for your dry cleanin'
When my **** gets in your shoe, what?
And as for the drug use, well I can vouch for that
My **** is scared of you, girl

Okie-dokie, one final question
If you can steal a smooch from
Any guy in Hollywood, who would it?
No more questions, what