I was runnin' through the summer rain
Waiting for the evenin' train
To kill that old familiar pain
Weavin' through my tangled brain
When I tipped my bottle back
Smacked into a cop I didn't see

That policeman said, 'Mister Cool
If you ain't drunk, then you're a fool'
I said, 'If that's against the law
Tell me why I never saw
No man locked in this jail of yours
Wasn't just as low down poor as me?'

And that's just when someone turned out the lights
Yes, and I wound up in jail to spend the night
And the dream of all the wine and lonely girls
In this best of all possible worlds

Next mornin' woke up feelin' like
My head was really gone
And like my thick old tongue
Was lickin' something sick and wrong
I said, 'I'd sell my soul for something
About as wet and cold as this old cell'

That kindly jailer looked at me
All eaten up with sympathy
Then poured himself another beer
Came and whispered in my ear
'If booze was just a dime a bottle
Boy, you couldn't even buy the smell'

I said, 'I knew there's something I liked about this town'
Oh, but it'll take more than that to bring me down
'Cause there's still a lot of wine and lonely girls
In this best of all possible worlds

Well, they finally came and told me
They was a gonna set me free
And I'd be leavin' town
If I knew what was good for me
I said, 'It's nice to learn
That everybody's so concerned about my health'

But I won't be leavin' no more quicker than I can
And I've enjoyed about as much of this as I can stand
And I don't need this town of yours
No more than I never needed nothin' else'

'Cause there's still a lot of drinks that I ain't drunk
Yes, and lots of pretty thoughts that I ain't thunk
Oh yeah, there's still a lot of wine and lonely girls
In this best of all possible worlds
In this best of all possible worlds
In this best of all possible worlds