Somewhere up town late last night
Around 9 o'clock there was a black snake
Crawling up the Latin American stairs
With his slicked black ****roachair

He was greasy lightning
He was looking for someone else
He said, 'I know you, you know me, hey, hey, lezzosee
I'm in the Mood to Mambo'

Yeah, bongo crazy man
Someone else pulled out a gun and said
'It's a little too late for that sort of thing
If you think that you're the white-black snake
Don't go messing with me, I'm not in the mood'

Somebody else pulled
I said 'Don't be rude, just say bongo crazy man'
Yah, been there, done that
Given every ***-for-tat I'm for me
You're for you, let's keep it that way, okay [unverified]

Meanwhile, later on underneath the river
Some frogman slipped on his black beret
Over his skin, tight rubbersuit, black boots
Looking for a place to go an' dive
Heading for the nearest diver's skive

Looking for love on the cheap rate
Go, gonna make it down with you wan' d'ja see?
He said, 'Crazy bongo
I'm in the mood to mambo'

Meanwhile, we can watch the come
Dancing compe***ions from the Midlands
International Danceband Orchestra
Lifting up their frilly chiffon skirts

They whirled and they twirled
In the late night rustle
To the beat of the muscle
Of the drum man Inanin

He's picking up the beat on the bongo skin
He was lookin' for love underneath that din
He was looking for me
He was looking for you

Till I walked up to the woman and I said
(With a shoe)
I'm in the mood to mambo
Bongo crazy

Shh, let me into one of the secrets of this place
Y'see the late night flick knives
Glitter through the window, careful where you go boy
Those knives are flick flack
Flagging through the dark, man

They're gonna cut your skin
I talked to Fr.Murphy and he swore he wouldn't tell
But some of those boys are gonna go to hell
See they're in the mood to mambo
Crazy bongo

Cha, cha, cha, the fog horns scream
And the boys go, 'Woo Woo'
I don't mind 'cos I'm with you
We go bongo crazy, yes we do
No we don't, bongo crazy