Ladies and gentlemen
Now is the moment you've all been waiting for

I'm the lovechild of the Queen
My blood is blue, it is not green
I was born to live upon the throne
Instead I signed up on the dole

Suppose my father was a King
Gifts to me he did not bring
Now every time I see a crown
It only makes me want to frown

You can't see there's something else I need
To help me on my way
Every time I think that I'm gonna cry
But I'd smile and I'd smile
But I haven't got the time

We're the *******s of the Queen
Our blood is blue, know what I mean
We were born to live upon four thrones
Instead we sign up on the dole

Suppose our father was a King
Gifts to us he did not bring
Now every time we see a crown
It only makes us want to ***king frown

You can't see there's something else I need
To help me on my way
A big fat line you know is what I mean
And I'd smile and I'd smile
But I haven't got the time

Now my story has been told
It's getting rather very old
Did I tell you about when I was christened
Jesus Christ was the name given

You can't see there's something else I need
To help me on my way
A big fat line you know is what I mean
And I'd smile and I'd smile
But I haven't got the, I haven't got the time