Sweep up the kitchen, hurry and do the dishes
Bring me a beer, mab' I'll let you go out with your other *****es
Sweep up the kitchen, could you turn off the goddamn lights?
Fetch me the remote control we got football tonite
Football tonite, football tonite

Sweep up the kitchen, hurry and do the dishes
Bring me a beer, mab' I'll let you go out with your other *****es
Sweep up the kitchen, could you turn off the goddamn lights?
Fetch me the remote control we got football tonite
Football tonite, football tonite

Did I tell ya last week when you cooked for me
That fried chicken was a little bit too greasy?
Them carrots that you cooked weren't boiled enough
Now when you gonna do something right? Get off your duff

Sweep up the kitchen, hurry and do the dishes
Bring me a beer, mab' I'll let you go out with your other *****es
Sweep up the kitchen, could you turn off the goddamn lights?
Fetch me the remote control we got football tonite
Football tonite, football tonite

Well, they told me last week at work that my shirts
They really weren't ironed that well
They told me last week at work that my shirts
They really weren't ironed that well, you said, 'Oh well'

Sweep up the kitchen, hurry and do the dishes
Bring me a beer, mab' I'll let you go out with your other *****es
Sweep up the kitchen, could you turn off the goddamn lights?
Fetch me the remote control we got football tonite
Football tonite, football tonite

You been tellin' all your friends that I drink too much man
Whiskey in the morning and it ain't no crutch
I never have time to take a big ****, man
You're always listening to that damn slim Whitman

Runnin' 'round the house with your shower cap on
Curlers in your hair and your toenails long
Chunky bar breath and your inquiring mind
When I see you in the morning looking like a pork rind

You snivel to your momma and you say you can't cope
Well this ain't thirty-something and you ain't hope now

Sweep up the kitchen, hurry and do the dishes
Bring me a beer, mab' I'll let you go out with your other *****es
Sweep up the kitchen, could you turn off the goddamn lights?
Fetch me the remote control we got football tonite
Football tonite, football tonite