Well, Ali Baba had them forty thieves
Scheherazade had a thousand tales
But master you in luck 'cause up your sleeves
You got a brand of magic never fails

You got some power in your corner now
Some heavy ammunition in your camp
You got some punch, pizzas, yahoo and how
See all you gotta do is rub that lamp and I'll say

Mister Aladdin, sir
What will your pleasure be?
Let me take your order, jot it down
You ain't never had a friend like me
Ho ho ho

Life is your restaurant
And I'm your maitre'd
C'mon whisper what it is you want
You ain't never had a friend like me

Yes sir, we pride ourselves on service
You're the boss, the king, the shah
Say what you wish, it's yours
True dish, how 'bout a little more Baklava?

Have some of column, 'A' try all of column, 'B'
I'm in the mood to help you dude
You ain't never had a friend like me
La la la, no man, la la la, no no la la la, la la la

Can your friends do this? Do your friends do that?
Do your friends pull this out their little hat?
Can your friends go poof! Well, looky here, ha ha
Can your friends go, abracadabra, let'er rip
And then make the sucker disappear?

So doncha sit there slack jawed, buggy eyed
I'm here to answer all your midday prayers
You got me bona fide, certified
You got a genie for your charge d'affaires

I got a powerful urge to help you out
So whatcha wish? I really wanna know
You got a list that's three miles long, no doubt
Well, all you gotta do is rub like so and oh

Mister Aladdin, sir, have a wish or two or three
I'm on the job, you big nabob
You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend
You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend
You ain't never had a