He
In a shopping mall
Finally met the perfect girl
She is all that matters
The only one in all the world
Like a Barbie doll

Oh, love is snakes and ladders
Snakes and ladders

She
Just to have and hold
Is the perfect air-brushed angel
Makes you hot just looking at her
Stapled into all his braincells
Like a centerfold

Oh, love is snakes and ladders
Snakes and ladders

Get to the top and slide back down
Get to the bottom climb back up
Buy the townhouse
Call the preacher

Get to the bottom climb back up
Get to the top and slide back down
Get to the bottom climb back up
Set up credit for the lovely creature
The lovely creature

He
On a corporate climb
Set his sights on power for her
On a silver platter
He gave up happy hour for her
Perrier and lime

Oh, love is snakes and ladders
Snakes and ladders

She
In a handsome world
Put her mind to social graces
All the privileged chatter
Setting pretty table places
For the girls in pearls

Oh, love is snakes and ladders
Snakes and ladders

Get to the top and slide back down
Get to the bottom climb back up
Buy the car phone
Call the broker

Get to the bottom climb back up
Get to the top and slide back down
Get to the bottom climb back up
Buy the wife a diamond choker
A diamond choker

True love, true love, true love
He's so nervous
New love, new love, new love
When he's with her
Oh, he's wasting away

True love, true love, true love
It's so curious
New love, new love, new love
Just to kiss her

To kiss her, to kiss her, to kiss her
To kiss her, to kiss her, to kiss her
To kiss her he has to shave

She
In the gilded mirrors
In the swing of fancy places
Where the black ties flatter
Started seeing other faces
Young, fogie-financiers

Oh, love is snakes and ladders
Snakes and ladders

See
In the crimes of time
How the seasons steal away
How the rungs are shattered
First you're green then you're gray
Still the snakes unwind

Still playin' snakes and ladders
Snakes and ladders

Get to the top and slide back down
Get to the bottom climb back up
Sell the vineyard
Call the lawyer

Get to the bottom climb back up
Get to the top and slide back down
Get to the bottom climb back up
Gather garbage to destroy her
To destroy her

Ladders, ladders, ladders
The perfect girl
Ladders, ladders, ladders
The paper chase

Ladders, ladders, ladders
The social whirl
Ladders, ladders
The rat race

Ladders, ladders, ladders
The perfect girl
Ladders, ladders, ladders
The paper chase

Ladders, ladders, ladders
The social whirl
Ladders, ladders
The rat race

Ladders, ladders, ladders
The perfect girl
Ladders, ladders, ladders
The paper chase

Ladders, ladders, ladders
The social whirl
Ladders, ladders
The rat race

Ladders, ladders, ladders
The perfect girl
Ladders, ladders, ladders
The paper chase

Ladders, ladders, ladders
The social whirl
Ladders, ladders
The rat race