It's Sunday night, I am curled up in my room
The TV light fills my heart like a balloon
I hold it in as best I can, I know I'm just another fan
But I can't help feeling, I could love this secret agent man

And I can't wait any more for him to discover me
I got it bad for David Duchovny
David Duchovny, why won't you love me?
Why won't you love me?

My friends all tell me
'Girl, you know it's just a show'
Deep within his eyes
I see me wrapped up like a bow

Watching the sky for a sign
The FBI is on my mind
I'm waiting for the day
When my lucky stars align

In the form of David Duchovny floating above me
In the alien light of the spaceship of love, I need
David Duchovny hovering above me
American Heath cliff, brooding and comely

David Duchovny, why won't you love me?
Why won't you love me? Why won't you love me?

This man is so smart
He's abducted my heart and I'm falling apart
From the looks I receive, from those eyes I can't leave
And you may say I'm naive, but he told me to believe

Ooh, my bags are packed
I am ready for my flight
Want to put an end to
My daydream days and sleepless nights

Sitting like a mindless clone
I'm wishing he would tap my phone
And just to hear the breath
Of the man, the myth, the monotone

And I would say, “David Duchovny, why won't you love me?
Why won't you love me? Why won't you love me?”
David Duchovny, why won't you love me?
Why won't you love me? Why won't you love me?

David Duchovny, I want you to love me
To kiss and to hug me, to debrief and to debug me
David Duchovny I know you could love me
I'm sweet and I'm cuddly, I'm gonna kill Scully!

And David Duchovny, why won't you love me?
Why won't you love me? Why won't you love me? Yeah