I'm always offending my sensitive friends
With my loud lingo-istics and rat-poison pen
When I fly through the air on a cheap chandelier
Crashing down on the party below, what a stupidly great way to go

Molly, why don't you love me no more
Remember the good times we had long before?
You with your lemon and me with my spoon

All dressed up like a clown with a big red balloon
You with you hat pin and me in a thong
Doing Disco Forever, where did we go wrong?

I'm always defending my sensitive friends
For their upright behavior and uncertain ends
Though the eyes may be blinking, the light never bends
Casting doubt on the depth of the soul
And the flakes never fall from the bowl

Molly, why don't you hold me no more
Remember the newspaper spread on the floor?
With you and your classifieds, me with my bag

Stuffed full of sandwiches, you with the rag
Wiping the dust off the keys to the car
Planning your getaway, scraping the jar

You don't say the words you used to say
And so I'm sad all day

I'm always pretending my sensitive friends
Are the ones who don't like me
And that's where it ends

The gavel bangs down
The judge says 'Enough'
The lawyers all turn into clouds
There's a sign posted 'No dogs allowed'