Five guys take a ride, drive a day and half a night
Get to see some pretty scenery
But if that's all there is to this
This band would split right down the seams

Southbound, static on the radio
We left town but where we're goin' I don't know
Somewhere we're gonna play another show
Quick get off and gas up at the Conoco

We're driving
We drive against the grain
Like postmen in the rain

Welcome to our big rock show
Wind us up and watch this puppy go
Hope you heard a single word we said
One little rock to rattle in your head

Hey kid, pit mosh, please avoid the flashpot
Yeah, it's really funny 'til an eyebrow gets singed off
Your mother's got nothing here to fear or dread
Our abrasive is gentle on baby's skin head

Soundchecks, don't forget the spandex
This mix is sounding like a bad train wreck
It takes some spit and grit and sweat
To give you more than you expect

We're driven
To give you what we know
Like postmen through the snow

Welcome to our big rock show
Wind us up and watch this puppy go
Hope you heard a single word we said
One little rock to rattle in your head

Got a cryptic coder
On the microphone
Find the secret message
Buried in our big rock show