It's one thing to know it
But another to admit
We're the worst band in the world
But we don't give a

If Garbo played guitar
With Valentino on the drums
Then we'd be nothing more than
A bunch of darma bums
So tune up, tune up

Well, we've never done a day's work in our life
And our records sell in zillions
It irrigates my heart with greed
To know that you adore me

Up yours, up mine
But up everybody's that takes time
But we're working on it
Working on it

We never seen the van
Leave it to the roadies
Never met the roadies
Leave them in the van

All because of circumstances way beyond control
We became the darlings of this thing called rock and roll, ooh

Here I am a record on a jukebox
A little piece of plastic with a hole

Play me
Buy me then you play me, then my plastic turns to gold

Here we are together on your hi-fi
A little piece of plastic with a hole, oh

Fade me, fade me, fade me, fade me
Fade me, fade me, fade me, fade me